whats with the younger crowd these days...

[gremlinsteve]

so me and the wife of well over 20 years go to the movies tonight. first time in a while since i have been locked down in a dang hospital bed ext for a few months. but since i have been feeling better we made the trip..

get inside and low and behold we run across my nephews wife....and her "friend"......
never really liked this girl one bit...just seems off if you where to ask me. biut my wife has always given her the benefit of the doubt..

at first i had not noticed her, but my ol lady did. sitting next to this kat in the theater smooching up a storm. she at some point saw us as she texted my ol lady hello. when asked by my better half if that was her in the theater she started at that point to ignore us and get nervous. you could see it.

it appears she was bieng a bit "arrogant" in the original text we feel, like she was saying hi look at me thinking she had not been seen.

so movies over, i have to step out before bad things happen and all, as one could understand. ol lady stands by the exit waiting. after 10 minutes the girl steps out with this turd in tow. she realized my woman was standing there and would not look at her, skirted her way to the front of this theater and sat down with the turd.

so we left. she made eye contact as we did. it was one of "oh heck"...i just got caught.

now, on a normal day i would be all about speaking my mind to the nephew, but i am having trouble reaching him. he is currently stuck in a turd hole fighting with the first infantry division in afghanistan. (turdistan).

after three tours there myself and one else where i think im just gonna wait till the youngster gets back home on this one. but in the mean time this turd lover is soaking up his paychecks ext....



it seems that this is how the young people in this country are behaving these days....im deeply saddened by this.



steve-o

 

[LindsayEOD]

Reminds me of my ex-wife. I will say though, I think it was better to find out while deployed, not after getting back. Unfortunately, it happens to a LOT of military. I don't envy your position one bit Steve. Each guy is different on how they take it.

 

[TMSBOSS]

Steve

I do not envy your situation. Your relationship with your nephew changed when you was what you saw. Nothing you can do about that.

After 20+ years in uniform, 20 in group, I have seen this TOO many times. Some believe their vows/commitment is for life. Others believe TDY means Temporarily Divorced from You.

Lindsey has a point concerning knowing as well as preparing for an unpopular outcome. If he knows sooner than later, he can prepare legally for the future. First lawyer usually wins. The downside is not knowing how he will handle the news while in the stan.

Good luck with this issue.

 

[steveespo]

This is a real sh/tty situation. Honor means nothing to many of this and maybe the last 4 generations (including mine). How someone can cheat on a person who puts their life on the line every day for our freedom really kills me. Woman up and tell the person you are leaving before going with another.

I really feel for you nephew, but wouldn't tell him when he is in country unless you are absolutely sure of his mental state and stress level. There have been way too many suicides among our young people in service and this is the kind of thing that pushes people over the edge. At home I think is better and even then it's gonna be tough. Please do tell him that us old guys here at BMO appreciate what he and the rest of the Forces are doing over there, I find it amazing that so many fine young people volunteered and continue to volunteer to clean up the world to make life safe for us at home. Last year I ran with some really good boys who both have done multiple 1 year tours in both Iraq and Afghanistan, they were just awesome young men doing a great job for all of us.
Sorry for the long rant but reading your post made me mad and sad as I lay in bed with my wife and daughters in a hotel in Daytona, enjoying life in the greatest country in the world, because of men like your nephew.
Steve

 

[302BOB]

I wouldn't let the nephew know anything til he got back either. That news would just fester inside him while he was deployed....and there's always the chance he wouldn't be able to handle it.

 

[PeteInCT]

Steve - needless to say I feel for you and your nephew. I was born in '59 and never served, but I have a deep respect of those that have or do. I agree mums the word until he gets back. Then, if you think he's of the right state to handle the news, I believe it's a family members responsibility (your's or whomever) to lay down the facts. He needs to know the truth sooner than later so he can get past the situation and either fix it or move on. But only when he's here and not out there fighting for our ability to sit here and type on an open forum....


-Pete

 

[cbj5259]

What a terrible situation. I have to echo what some of the others stated. I would not burden him with any other stress while he is in country. He has enough on his plate. When he gets back, sit him down and talk to him about it. Tell him you are there for him and offer him guidance. These poor guys have so much to deal with already when they come home, its just ashame. But I think letting him know while he's over there and can't do anything about it, is worse IMO.

 

[PJWANNABE]

My two cents....

I was in Navy and saw this all the time. Some women were out in the local bars picking up guys that same night that their husband's ship deployed. Younger people today though are not as discreet about it. Some couples have an understanding or open relationships during deployments, but if there is nothing like that between her and your nephew then she is a cheat. Unless you know for sure she is planning to screw him over when he gets back, I would not say anything to him now. As dangerous as it is over there you don't want him distracted and getting himself hurt or killed. I'm sorry that you and your wife have to deal with that burden. It is probably a good idea to confront her with it and find out what her intentions are.

 

[Zquez]

I have seen this in my unit as well. It happened to my best friend when he was at boot and that's only 3 months. Its always been going on though. When my dad was in the 82nd Airborne in the 80s he saw women who would kiss their husbands goodbye for them to go to a field exercise and then turn around and be at the NCO or O club hooking up with other Army guys. Btw field exercises usually last from a week to a month. I hate to say it, but the woman did take the first bite of the apple. I have seen enough cases of this shiznit in my lifetime to be of the opinion that most all women are wolves in sheep's clothing. The exceptions are rare, and luckily I think I snagged one. I would say keep this crap on lock till he gets back but I for one would be pretty pissed to come home to no money, another man in my bed, and an Uncle who knew all along.

If you wanna really get pissed off, read this story about a devil dog that this happened to - only she got pregnant and now he has to pay child support for another mans mistake. Spoiler: he didnt take legal action soon enough so she won the suit. Sooner is most likely better.

http://rhinoden.rangerup.com/the-curious-case-of-staff-sergeant-parsons/

 

[gremlinsteve]

i really do not know which way to take it. i am leaning hard towards just waiting till hes back. i do not think telling him now is going to change anything that can and will happen.
cash in accounts can be replaced. how is he going to change that from the stan, i have no clue.

she caused him some grief in riley, but i am not privy to that information. have no idea what trouble ect.

me and the better half have already called her out on it. shes busted and she knows it.
she has lied to us already, so i do not think things will change. some folks i know will follow her on occasion, catch her in her act again. she thinks she is smarter than most. that will be her downfall.s


and yes, i was at bragg also. 27 plus years. so i know what the bragg wives did when the division was out.


steve-o

 

[racered302]

I would wait until he gets back and see if she says something, if not then tell him.

 

[302BOB]

Yes, there are good women out there & not so good women out there (same applies to men also...let's be fair) I've been blessed to have been married to two of the good ones. My first wife died suddenly 23 yrs ago & I remarried 2 yrs later to a beautiful lady who bore me my fantastic son. Life's a crap shoot...you go for what you think is your dream & hope for the best....glad my better half went along with me getting my Boss!...makes the journey that much better..

 

[emcrace]

I also have seen this too many times. The biggest problem is I have also witnesed once caught the woman cleans him out and boggies. I would tell him so he could stop sending his checks home if he wants. And if he knows maybe he can salvage his stuff before she pawns it.

 

[NewBossowner]

Shitty situation for him, I feel bad. He is risking it all for her and us to have a better life and she does that too him. Theres a word for people like her.
Hard to call though, let him know so he can cover himself if he can or wait till he is home and safe. I do not envy you that descision. But you tell him all of us here appreciate what he is doing over there and pray for his safe return.

 

[ufnavy06]

We had a pilot who got married about 3 weeks before we went out the door on our previous deployment. Turns out his wife was messing around with his best friend and it was the second time he caught her. The first was before they got engaged and they said they'd move past it. Well, she apparently didn't move past it and he had to deal with it while away. He actually dealt with it pretty well and our wardroom rallied around him, which I think had a lot to do with it.

Point being, never a good situation. We're land based and got to come back to a nice BOQ room every night, but he was flying 11 of us around in a multimillion dollar aircraft while going through this. I can't imagine any way this works out well. It might be best to see if you can get a chaplain or something along those lines to break the news, it might work. But I know that has a very negative connotation as well.

 

[Zquez]

+1 for the chaplain. And if the chaplain feels that there are any mental instabilities its his responsibility to report it to the CO. Chances are that if it was a problem and the chaplain noticed he'd probably have some close eyes on him.

 

[BOSS343]

I feel for ya and your nephew. The blatent disrespect of my own generation is astonishing (I am 25) let alone the work ethic. I will echo those above me and wait it out till he gets back home and settled in.

Not to sound like a broken record but some of my closest friends have served and I have so much respect them and for their service.

Hang tough,
Paul